Tips for Planning a Fulfilling Valentines Day

For a holiday all about love and happiness, Valentines Day can cause more stress than it should. As with relationships, unmet expectations lead to disappointment. If you have a significant other, at least you know you will have someone to share the Hallmark holiday with. If you’ve been married for a while you may wish you were single when Valentines Day comes around. If you are single, this holiday can be downright depressing, or with some planning it can be fun. Here are some tips to plan a fulfilling Valentines Day.

Plan to go out to give yourself a break from cooking and cleaning. You and your significant other need a break from being overwhelmed with work and chores.

If in a relationship, plan for a romantic dinner or overnight.

Here are a few hotels in San Diego County that offer Valentines Day all-inclusive packages starting at $219. Reserve early, or plan the celebration on an off night say the day or weekend after Valentines Day, which will save money and hopefully be less crowded.

Rancho Bernardo Inn and Winery Valentine’s Day Package includes one night accommodations, a four-course special Valentines Day dinner, and a sweet treat amenity, starting at $219 for two people.

The Hotel Del Coronado offers a variety of packages including a Hotel Del Coronado’s Sweetheart Ball and “That’s S’mores” package including side by side massages, champagne and you guessed it – S’mores.

Tip:  Are you usually handling all the social plans in your relationship? Ask your significant other to make the plans, and give them ideas.

You don’t have to plan a trip away in another city to have a romantic Valentines Day. Search the hotels websites in your own city for specials. You’ll save on the transportation, and if you have pets, find one that allows fido to come with you. Most Hilton hotels are now welcoming  pets to come stay for a small extra “cleaning” fee.

Want to stay in? Try cooking a dinner, or get take out, that includes all foods that are red or heart shapes. Ideas: spaghetti, lasagna, bruchetta with red tomatoes, pancakes, eggs, or cookies, in shape of heart. World Market has heart-shaped cookie cutters for 99 cents 

If single, decide if you want to stay in or go out.

Staying in and want to have quiet time by yourself? Treat yourself to your favorite take out, chocolate or pastry dessert, and snuggle up with your cat or dog, and a good movie or book. Here’s a fun exercise to boost your spirits: remind yourself of three things that you love about yourself.

Prefer t stay in, and don’t want to be alone? Invite your single friends and family over for wine, cheese, and chocolate. Here’s a fun exercise to share the love: cut out heart shapes from red paper, hand out sharpies, and ask your friends and family to write at least one thing they love about the others at the party. Ideas: “I love how compassionate Susan is”, or “I love Kathy’s shoes”, or “I love John’s smile”.

Tip – have a maid come clean so you don’t have to stress about having the time to clean the house before guests come over.

Single and don’t want to stay home?

Venture out on your own to meet new people. Browse single groups at Meetup to find an event in your area. Don’t worry if you are going by yourself and not dragging another single friend along. There will be others going to the event on their own too, wanting to meet other single people. It’s easier to strike up conversations if you are on your own rather than engrossed in conversation with a friend.

Tip: If you are venturing out to a “meetup” event on your own, an added safety measure is to text a friend when you arrive and when you get home. Be sure to text your friend both times, and not get distracted, so they don’t worry and send out a search party.

Overall the best way to have a fulfilling Valentine’s Day is to lose the expectations of the “perfect” day or evening. Isn’t just being with your loved one, no matter what you are doing, enough? Whether your valentine is your significant other, friends, family, dog, or just yourself, don’t get caught up in the overrated have-to-be-perfect romance of the day with cards and gifts. Simply tell and show your loved ones you love them without being materialistic. A thoughtful gesture, such as washing their car, writing down the top five reasons you love them, or paying them an unexpected compliment, goes a long way.

Photo taken by Jordan Bruhn Dec 2012. View of San Diego Skyline from Coronado island.